Tuesday, 21 January 2014

Steampunk Sports #1 The Chap Olmpiad

The Chap Olympiad describes its founders as 'a celebration of eccentricity and athletic ineptitude with the emphasis on panache and style over sporting prowess'.

The Chap Olympiad is derived from the tongue-in-cheek principles of Chappism (visit The Chap magazine for more information) but is a event that could easily be participated in by Steampunks.

The official Chap Olympiad runs in Britain, but I think it would be great if it ran in other countries as well, and hope to soon see it in Australia! Of course, female chaps may participate as well.

Pictures from past Olympiads can be found here on the official site. 

Here is a rundown of the 2011 event from the Chap Magazine

I have also heard of the following, although they were not included in this event:  Three Trousered Limbo, Cucumber Sandwich Discus and Pipe Smoker's Relay. I believe the Three Trousered Limbo involves doing the limbo in teams whose pants have been sewn together.

The Pipeathlon: Contestants must complete a 10-yard course using three disciplines – pipe smoking, cycling and being carried by their servants across the finishing line.

Gentlemen’s Club Golf: Contestants must lob a bowler hat into a large fishing net using a walking stick. Extra points are awarded for the wearing of plus fours and harlequin socks.

Swooning: A line of chaps faces a line of chapettes, and the chaps have to induce the ladies to swoon through any means possible.

Butler Baiting: The butler must assemble a decent outfit by running back and forth between his master and a suitcase full of clothing. The head butler will judge the final outfits.

Not Playing Tennis: Players seated in deck chairs play a game of tennis while occupied with more important tasks such as reading a newspaper and filling their pipes. Extra points are awarded for skillful use of the Ball Boy and Ball Girl.

Ironing Board Surfing: Contestants mount their ironing boards, holding a cocktail, and are carried over the finishing line by their staff. Points are deducted for spillages and displacement of trouser creases/hemlines.

Moustache Wrestling: Two hirsute contestants must pluck a single hair from their opponent’s lip weasel. If the whole moustache comes off, the opponent is immediately disqualified for twirling under false pretences.

Briefcase Phalanx: 20 contestants, clutching briefcases and handbags, create an office phalanx. Lone contestants must charge at them and try to break through to the secretary on the other side, and dictate a letter to her.

Shouting at Foreigners: Contestants must negotiate with a curmudgeonly, uncooperative foreign shop assistant by ordering a specific item from his shop. Points are lost for ungentlemanly language and hitting the foreigner. (This is apparently intended as a parody of the “Little Englander” mentality, the sort of person who shouts loudly in English thinking this will make him understood, rather than the ‘foreigner’ as such' however if it is believed offence may be incurred, it might be best to remove this from the events.)

Umbrella Jousting: Two contestants, armed only with brollies and briefcases, must go at one another on bicycles and attempt to knock each other off.

Prize giving ceremony to award gold, silver and bronze cravats.


  1. This sounds great. I especially love the "not playing tennis" and "ironing board surfing" contests. I'm sure Bertie Wooster would be grand at all these (and this also reminds me of the fact that I need more tweed in my wardrobe). ^^

    1. I think I would excel at not playing tennis!

  2. Ahh, lovely sports all of them! :)